Grab a piece of paper and answer these three questions.
1. I feel loved and cared about when you… These are things your partner already does that make you feel loved and cared for. Get specific like “buy me chocolate” or “snuggle on the couch.”
2. I used to feel loved and cared about when you… Usually, these are things from the early and romantic stage of a relationship. Are there behaviors that you used to do for each other that you no longer do?
3. I would like you to… Now think about loving and caring behaviors that you have always wanted, but never asked for. Perhaps it’s “take me out once a month” or “sleep nude with me sometimes.”
By going through this exercise, you become more intimate with one another. It allows you to express your own desires to your partner, and it gives you the very important opportunity to learn how to better support them.
The more intimacy there is in a relationship, the stronger the bond of the couple. And what better way to recharge your relationship than feeling safe enough to express your wants and needs? If you both go in with an open mind and an honest intent, the relationship can really grow and strengthen through this exercise.